What Would Jesus Drive?

Cars: "an occasion for sin"

Whenever I see a driver with a jesus fish on the trunk of their car being obnoxious by cutting lines or ignoring the basic rules of the road, I immediately think something along the lines of 'hypocrite' or 'godly my ass' because it seems that it's very un-christian of them.

Well sinners, the Vatican has spoken and you are going to Hell.

Yesterday the Vatican's office released The 10 Commandments of Driving, which now upon closer inspection I realize says nothing about respecting the rules of the road. Damn it. Those fuckers are still going to cut me off without using their damn turn signals - the Vatican said they could.

And does anyone know why they need a separate set of commandments for driving? Aren't the base 10 supposed to cover how you live your entire life? No? Are there different commandments for different aspects of your life? What commandments does the dude who extorts cash from his flock have to live by?

The 10 Commandments of Driving

1. You shall not kill.

2. The road shall be for you a means of communion between people and not of mortal harm.

3. Courtesy, uprightness and prudence will help you deal with unforeseen events.

4. Be charitable and help your neighbour in need, especially victims of accidents.

5. Cars shall not be for you an expression of power and domination, and an occasion of sin.

6. Charitably convince the young and not so young not to drive when they are not in a fitting condition to do so.

7. Support the families of accident victims.

8. Bring guilty motorists and their victims together, at the appropriate time, so that they can undergo the liberating experience of forgiveness.

9. On the road, protect the more vulnerable party.

10. Feel responsible toward others.

In my book, if you have to be told this stuff, then you're barely a good human, let alone a good worshipper.